The Death Road...Appropriately Titled (Bolivia)

The next morning proved to be a bit more stressful than we had hoped.  We woke up relaxed, ate breakfast, and headed for the border, which was insane.  Most people have a pretty easy time at the Peruvian/Bolivian border, but that day, there was some massive festival, so we found ourselves stuck in a long line of buses waiting as we inched our way closer.  When we finally arrived at the actual border, the process was easy and regular, lines, copies and more copies and we proceeded on our way.  After getting a bit turned around on the road, we found the highway toward La Paz and spent the next few hours driving through no-man's-land.  As we approached the city, traffic became a bit worse and towns seemed to become grungier.  The were piles of trash chest high lining both sides of the highway, and fake people strung up on light posts warning against stealing...cryptic.  When we got within the city of La Paz, the drive got worse.  Jared had been driving all day, and the city traffic and chaos got to him, so we switched.   We have driven through countless Latin American cities at this point, but La Paz takes the cake for biggest shit show.  There are literally no freaking rules here, pedestrians are out of their minds, and the small buses stop in the middle of the road to allow people on and off.  There is no driving courtesy, people drive through red lights; it was impossible, and after the short hour and a half getting in, I was fuming.  We first made our way to the Brazilian embassy in hopes of getting our paperwork in and being able to enjoy Bolivia while it was being processed. Shouldn't take more than 4-5 days right?  Unfortunately, by the time we arrived, due to the crap-hole that is driving in La Paz, we were too late and the office had closed for the weekend, as it was Friday.  A bit dejected, we headed in search of our hostel, which we found relatively easily.   We unpacked, and attempted to find a few activities to distract ourselves until Monday.  We spent the day browsing options, and relaxing.  The next day, we leisurely woke up and got our money's worth of the all-you-can-eat pancake breakfast at our hostel, Adventure Brew Hostel.  We walked around town a bit, attempted to join a free walking tour, which didn't end up happening, and looked for some tour agencies.  We decided to attempt the World's Most Dangerous Road, Ruta de la Muerte, translation: Route of Death.   The next morning, we woke early (missing out free breakfast) and met up with our tour group.  We wore warming layers as the morning was quite cold, and the bike ride started at a glacier.  After an hour and a half bus ride to the glacier, we prepped with our safety gear, a helmet, jacket and pants, and received our bike and instructions.  The first half hour or so of biking was down a steep, active road, which was scary enough, as there was no designated bike area, so we were biking on an active highway.  There were four boys, including Jared, who flew down, one girl who went at a snails pace, and two guides, one in the front, one in the back, and me, trying, unsuccessfully, to keep up with the boys, and guide-less.  When we finally made it to the Death Road, it was a dirt and gravel road, barely one lane in width;  I literally have no idea how this was supposed to be a two lane road.   We started down, again divided in three groups as the boys went too fast and the other girl went too slow.  The ride was pretty awesome.  We road through waterfalls, and had some amazing views, which you could only enjoy when you stopped, as the road was too treacherous to take in the sights.  Jared conquered the road like a champion speed demon...me less so.  At one point, my bike was acting funny and kept switching gears, so I was basically peddling without actually moving.  I couldn't see the front group at all, got off my bike to see if I could fix it or wait for the other girl and guide, but when neither of them showed up, and let's be honest, I know nothing about bikes and was not about to be able to fix anything, I got back on and tried to stuntedly make my way to the next check point.  At this point, I was insanely tired from peddling and not getting anywhere, and my butt was about to fall off.  I basically passed the guys, going at a snails pace, before I finally heard my name called.  Note to all riding a bike, do not stand and peddle and then attempt to hit the brakes before sitting down.  I heard my name, grabbed the braked before sitting, and flew over my handle bars, Hollywood style.  I did perform a pretty good tuck-and-roll, and didn't hurt anything, but lay on the ground trying to catch my breath before the guide and Jared came over reminding me this was an active road, and helped me up.   I told the guide my bike was broken, but when he rode it, of course, it performed just fine.  It wasn't until I attempted to get back in the bike for the next stint of riding that my chain actually broke...slamming my already wounded nether-region into the bike bar below the seat...lovely.  I was able to change bikes, for a much nicer one, and continued down.  Again I was left solo on the ride, until I took a turn too fast, hit a series of rocks, and unable to regain my balance, flew again off my bike into the mountain, and my bike flew into me.  That second fall was bad.  I slammed my head and hip into the rocks and just lay there a few minutes trying to recoop before the second guide found me.  I stood up to get back on my bike, and fainted for a second only.  After another minute, I got back on the bike, and took the other girls place as the slowest rider.  My head, hip and knee were throbbing, but the ride was short, as we were almost at the bottom, thankfully.   The day ended with some pain killer I've never heard of, a few beers, crummy lunch, and a nice dip in a river at the bottom of the road. The ride back to La Paz was long, made longer by my stupid hip, but when we got back, I limped straight into bed for the sweet relief of sleep